A Woman's Voice

MEMORY LANE ~ YOU ARE NOT BROKEN ~ November 14, 2011 Andrea Cockerill

Posted in MEMORY LANE by doloresayotte on November 14, 2011
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A WOMAN’S VOICE – My Daughter’s Voice 

Although the memory of our first breath when we entered this world is beyond our recollection, its innocence and wonder are no less profound. You just have to look at your own or any newborn child to see the vulnerability and utter newness of when a new soul begins its journey into the experience of being a human being.  When babies grow into toddlers, you can see the fearlessness of a child’s innate curiosity and how it propels them into following any and all of their hearts desires, which on many occasions goes against that of their mothers! 

Imagine living this way as an adult, following your heart’s desires with wild abandon. At some point in our childhood we go from living fearlessly, to viewing the world as unsafe. We start to realize that not all is right with the world and we internalize it as meaning that all is not right with us. At a deep level we turn from the experience of the newborn, a being of pure perfection, to feeling as if we are someone who is broken and in need of fixing. How painful it is to see ourselves in this light. We then start the process of seeing ourselves as possessing much darker traits. 

Many people may not even realize that they actually think this way because it goes beyond the awareness stage. It is at a subconscious level as evidenced by the words we say to ourselves about our lives. How many times have we said, if such and such happens, then I will feel good, be happy, find joy, be worthy of love, etc.?  This kind of thinking implies that at the core of our being, something is broken.  We then project this brokenness on the surface areas of our lives, our job, our bodies, our families, our communities and the list goes on. Isn’t easier to try to fix that, which is outer, than to go deep within ourselves and feel the emotion of brokenness, vulnerability and just plain not measuring up? 

In my opinion, we spend so much time protecting ourselves and our spirit, trying to fix that which is truly not broken. Yes…you are not broken. There is nothing to fix. The centre of your being is pure perfection and light. It is the part of you that always was and always will be. You can’t lose it, damage it, abandon it, or escape the love that resides in you. You may have developed coping mechanisms along the way to protect yourself that have created layers similar to that of an onion. With compassion and faith, each of these layers can be carefully peeled away to reveal the wonder and innocence you came with when you entered into this world as pure perfection itself. 

When you learn to view yourself as whole, failure won’t have such a high price tag. It won’t run so deep and healing won’t take so long after you stumble and fall. Highs and lows would be just a part of life because the thread running through life’s challenges would originate from a feeling of innate wholeness and love. I pray for this for myself and for all women, and I pray each one of us experiences the joy of living with wild abandon like that of an innocent child. 

When I was young, I was innocent and saw the world as limitless. Now that I am older, I may see the limits of this world, but my faith sees the limitlessness of God. It is this faith that allows me to spread my wings and take a chance on life. 

Thank you Andrea! 

Andrea lives in Winnipeg with her husband Jeremy and is the mother of four children.   She holds a Bachelor of Arts Degree with a major in Psychology as well as a Bachelor of Social work from the University of Manitoba. 

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7 Responses to 'MEMORY LANE ~ YOU ARE NOT BROKEN ~ November 14, 2011 Andrea Cockerill'

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  1. Lorraine Gauthier said,

    What a beautiful article Andrea!! The wisdom is breath taking!!!

  2. Lyn said,

    You are so right about the feelings of children. Young children are so ego-centric that they think all the bad things that happen are their fault. As a kindergarten teacher I’ve often talked with children who’ve blamed themselves for a family break-up, or even the death of a loved one.

  3. Shirley Sarafinchan said,

    “You Are Not Broken” certainly hits home for me Andrea! After a serious illness one of the first things you are taught by professionals ie. Psychologists, Hypnotists is to “peel the onion” and learn to forgive yourself. The concept is of course to bring yourself back to the innocence of a small child. This is very difficult to achieve because even before we leave the stage of innocence we are bombarded by everything that teaches “evil”. The angry & negative words “bad, no, don’t do that, stop, behave etc.” are in all of our vocabularies and our small innocent children will hear these words before they hear positive words so the breakdown of innocence begins. You are most intuitive Andrea and I enjoy reading your blogs very much!

  4. louise gauthier said,

    Andrea! I found
    your article excellent…….. you certainly captured how I feel within (so inadequate how could anyone love me.) thank you for making me realize that this is the lie, the original sin in my mind which prevents us seeing that at the very core of our being we are still those innocents that came from our spiritual base to start our earthly journey…your article comes to me as a refreshing wind after a lovely rain.. I can see brilliant colours again and breath in if just for a moment the purity of my soul….once again thank you
    sincerely,Louise Gauthier

    • Thank you Louise, Lyn, Lorraine and Shirley for your wonderful, well thought out comments. I am very proud of Andrea and I look forward to posting your articles too. 🙂

      • Andrea said,

        Thank you all for such beautiful comments. It feels so wonderful to connect with other women who speak the same language of the heart and who understand exactly what I am trying to say. Your comments encourage me to keep writing and I thank you for that!

  5. Your last paragraph was excellent, Andrea. You tied your entire post together by showing that God created you – perfect in every way. He loved you from the moment of conception. When we reach out to Him, He can indeed peel away the worldly imperfections that have scarred our lives and make us clean again – purified by Jesus.

    And I loved the part, “You may have developed coping mechanisms along the way to protect yourself that have created layers similar to that of an onion. With compassion and faith, each of these layers can be carefully peeled away to reveal the wonder and innocence you came with when you entered into this world as pure perfection itself.

    I pray with you that women everywhere will look up and see that God loves them and that He can make them innocent again. In Jesus’ name I pray. AMEN

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