A Woman's Voice

BLOG HOPPING DAY ~ Shadow Of The Hammer ~ June 1, 2011

Posted in BLOG HOPPING by doloresayotte on June 1, 2011
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In life, oftentimes, we use extremely creative or descriptive words to help us form a more accurate picture about what we are trying to describe. The stronger the words, the more the message hits home. I think this is one of the best ways to truly get our messages across. A mental image is much easier to remember and makes our words all the more meaningful. In the article I am sharing with you today, Mystic Mom uses the hammer to describe the negative impact some people have had on her life as they hammered home their message to her. This is just a short excerpt from her article.

“Abusers and controllers may have other tools but the prefer their hammers.  They like the power of it. They like the brutality of it.  When I started to write, to heal, to finally feel unafraid there loomed over me the shadow of an emotional hammer.  The memory, the shadow, the ache of those times when it was not the only tool but the preferred one.”

Please take a moment to visit  Scarred Seeker in order to read her full message.

FREE DRAW ~ Anyone who leaves a comment on any article from now until June 15th, gets their name put in a draw for a free copy of my book ”Growing Up & Liking It”.  The more comments that you leave the greater your chances of winning. Good Luck!


3 Responses to 'BLOG HOPPING DAY ~ Shadow Of The Hammer ~ June 1, 2011'

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  1. Ginny was unable to leave this comment so I am posting it for her.

    “…as a Mom that is the last thing I want to be. As a wife it is not what I want to do. As a friend I would rather have empty hands. I confess I can be a brutal hammer but I’m learning.”

    Powerful, thank you for being so transparent. And thank you Dolores, for posting the link to this blog on your page.

    Thanks Ginny!

  2. Charles Betts said,

    Dolores; What sadness I read in this lady’s post. So many people unhappy with who they are lash out at others, Thinking, I think, that somehow this lashing out and deflating others will cause themselves to appear higher on the scale of humanity. It has been my decision since a young man in my late teens that the words I use would build and strengthen those I converse with. Once I began practising this I soon realized that when a person is happy with who they are they tend to leave others alone. One of my first thoughts when I hear someone degrading another is, ” here is a very unhappy person”. I have yet to see this otherwise.

    My father was a very verbally abusive person. Thankfully for me, by the time I was 15-16 years old, I realized that his problems need not become mine, nor his character mine. By God’s grace and the scriptures I was able to forgive him and pray for his change. At the same time, I believe it was due to God helping me to recognize these traits, that I was able to change how my person developed. I am so glad He did.

    I would also like to discuss some the part about controllers. It is my believe that controllers want to control because they are afraid to love and open their heart to love. They are also afraid to share their soul because they are afraid they will lose a part of themselves somehow. I liken it sometimes to the widow who was told to go to her neighbors and borrow as many vessels as she could and fill them with the meager oil supply she had. The oil did not run out until the vessels stopped coming. Such is love I feel. We are to put as much into all who come as we can. It will not run out unless we stop pouring. Once we stop then the supply stops.

    I recognize that many times it takes great courage to love some people who we know will abuse that love. I think I mentioned in another email to you that my loving people has nothing to do with them many times, but more of what is in my heart to do. If they choose to abuse or under-appreciate that love, then that is their choice and a further indication of a very troubled soul.
    I was so very glad to read where this lady indicates that her healing has begun. As we help others to heal we heal ourselves. To her I say, let the healing flow outward and then it will surely happen inside.
    God Bless you and her for sharing, Charles Betts

    • Charles…I so love this response that once again I will post it on the main blog this Friday so that everyone can benefit from what you have shared here. Thanks and God bless you and your family!

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