“Growing Up And Liking It” ~ Book Review ~ February 28, 2011 by Hope
Book Review by Hope
Growing Up & Liking It: Thirteen Steps to a Happier Self
Author: Dolores Ayotte.
(Tate Publishing, © 2010, 192 pages)
At a time when most of our lives are complicated by schedule, commitment, stress and expectation, motivational author Dolores Ayotte greets us with a delightful, easy to read book that suggests an alternative approach to experiencing our lives. A follow-up book to I’m Not Perfect and It’s Okay, Growing Up and Liking It is a compilation of 13 life lessons, born of the wisdom of a life well lived and told through relatable stories, anecdotes, personal experiences and inspirational quotes. In her book, Ms. Ayotte encourages her readers to slow down, to listen, to question and become enthusiastic about the lives they lead.
As a reader, we are given a sneak peek into the Ms. Ayotte’s relationship with her friends, her husband, her children and her grandchildren. Her stories, simply told, convey not just the wisdom of her experiences but the way she reflects on her experiences to better her perspective and enhance her own life. Her stories convey a strong dependence on a faith well-honed, a spiritual soul at the center of her thought and natural teetering between the roles of teacher and student that lends a sense of humility in the conveyance of her message.
What I found quite interesting in the read of this book, is the number of inspirational quotes incorporated into the teaching of the 13 steps to a happier self. For me, this is testimony to the breadth of seeking and reflection that has gone into the living the life that inspired these lessons. Inspiration from the likes of Mother Theresa, the Bible and Vince Lombardi are woven into practical pearls of wisdom that are easy to apply to anyone’s life.
The underlying message I found in all 13 steps, is that in our own lives, we are the ones with the power to change what is not working. The author encourages us to know and address our own needs; physical, emotional and spiritual. She encourages us to choose wisely what we strive to be, and pay dear attention to the journey taken to achieve our goal. She encourages us to finish what we start, say what we mean and mean what we say. Though none of this is news to any of us, the reminder to pay attention to these simple things is so welcome in our event-driven, constant connect, always on, always available lifestyle that has come to be our way.
In reading this book, I felt like I was talking to an old friend. The language is simple yet poignant, the stories relatable and familiar, the rhythm of the read easy and the message clear and consistent. As I read her stories, I was reminded of similar ones in my own life and my own family making her message all the more accessible and her suggestions all the more applicable.
Each of the thirteen chapters ends with a summary and a reflection. In this, Ms. Ayotte gives the reader practical, doable suggestions to help us begin to examine our own lives and find the places where we can begin to find and welcome our true self.
The book ends with an Epilogue that reveals the delicate and painful experiences that paved the way for these lessons to be compiled. The startling honesty of Ms. Ayotte’s story inspires all us to question, to know ourselves, to trust ourselves and our instincts and to find and hear our own voice.
I’m Not Perfect and It’s OK and Growing Up & Liking It are must reads for anyone looking to better their station in life, is seeking to find and define their own life’s legacy or find their way through a personal crisis. The read is simple, the message profound and the author’s story an inspiration to be the best that is within us.
By: Hope Rising
Thanks so much Hope for the wonderful book review. It is greatly appreciated!
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LONGING ~ February 26, 2011 by Charles Betts
INSPIRATIONAL POEMS
Oh precious face of Jesus
When will I touch that brow
That held the crown of thorns?
No thought by hands that forced it down
As they caused the blood to flow
Or how the flesh was roughly torn.
I long so to touch the scars
That formed when stripes were healed
On the back of He who took my pain.
For too long I’ve stood afar.
How many times I’ve kneeled!!
I’ll come back and kneel again
I ache to hold the hands
Who held the little children close
And reassured them of Gods love.
The wind and waves He did command
As the storms in my life arose.
They will greet me in my home above
The side that took the Roman spear
From which the blood and water flowed
[The sign of death to those who knew]
Is the side I lean upon. So dear.
It is the gift of God bestowed
It held His heart. Now mine is new.
To kiss and wash with tears
The feet that walked on sea and sand
They carried Him to where hurting people lived
They bring sweet joy amid my fears
Oh to hold them gently in trembling hands
To Him such obeisance freely give
A poem by Charles Betts May 24th, 2005
Thanks Charles!
“COME TO ME” ~ Book Review ~ February 25, 2011 by Dolores Ayotte
“Come to Me” ~ 338 pages
Christian Author: Laura Davis
Author Laura Davis has managed to capture a facet of the holy family of Jesus, Mary and Joseph, that I have never been exposed to thus far. Davis’ book starts off with the story of Mary, Jesus’ mother at the age of fifty-eight years old. Although “Come To Me” is a fictional book, there are many biblical references to give authenticity to the story Davis has to share with her readers.
The apostles, Luke and Matthew, are spending time with Mary and quizzing her about her life as mother to Jesus. They are busy asking questions and taking notes in order to have a written account of exactly what took place before the birth of Jesus, the years that led up to His death and Mary’s life afterwards which lasted well into her eighties. The warmth and teasing manner that is exchanged between Mary, Luke and Matthew is an example of what is yet to come as this beautiful novel unfolds.
One of the concepts I found so refreshing and endearing is the human face that Davis gives to the holy family. She uses terms like Joseph with “his brown eyes twinkling with excitement” as he gives Mary a surprise gift (a prayer bench which Joseph preferred to use as a kissing bench). She also states that Mary “laughed” as she describes how protective Joseph and Jacob were as they stood guard outside the stable after the birth of Jesus. Yet again when Jesus was much older, Davis mentions that “Jesus’ eyes twinkled with merriment as he saw her confusion and wrapped his arms around her in a big bear hug. Laughing, he kissed her cheek…” as she describes Jesus’ affection for Ima, His mother.
Davis’ down-to-earth, humanistic description of the holy family brings this wonderful story to life in a unique and wonderful way. According to my religious teachings, “holy pictures” as they were referred to in my school days, have always depicted Jesus, Mary and Joseph as a very serious, sad, or sorrowful family. Even at the celebratory occasion of the birth of Jesus, these “holy pictures” did not express the usual happiness that one would expect upon the birth of a beautiful newborn baby. I personally love the expressions used by Davis as she describes this happy, smiling, well-adjusted family who, even though they experienced much pain and suffering, also knew great joy and happiness many times throughout their lives.
Davis manages to weave together a more present day version of family life with the usual spectrum of emotions intertwined that any family might experience. Jesus is described as the oldest of several brothers and two sisters and that He was eager to assist His mother by helping out with His younger siblings in order to ease her load. Therefore, this image of family life is one that we can more identify with and relate to in our roles as grandparents, parents, sons or daughters. This novel manages to capture many of the everyday occurrences that may happen in normal family life in our expressions of love, concern, fear, joy and sorrow. Davis’ novel “Come to Me” gives a human face to the holy family which makes us love this story about Jesus, Mary and Joseph all the more.
Davis has managed to retell an age-old story in a new and exciting way. I truly enjoyed reading this book and I hope you take the time to enjoy it as well.
A singer and a songwriter for over 25 years, Laura J. Davis began writing full-time after an emergency surgery caused the loss of her voice. She is a member of Canada’s largest community of writers who are Christian, The Word Guild, where she volunteers as first editor. Laura and her husband, Jim, reside in London Ontario. She invites you to contact her through her web site at Finding Joy in the Journey .
FREEDOM ~ February 23, 2011 by Charles Betts
INSPIRATIONAL POEMS
Full of imperfection, unaccepted by the crowd
Creating such frustration you want to shout out loud
So many inhibitions, self-esteem at an all-time low
No one explores your beauty, ‘cause no one wants to know
You’re not the same as others though you struggle to fit in
The way they step around you makes you wish you hadn’t been
Your spirit cries for freedom. You’re trapped within a cage
This body you’ve been given. It’s so hard to stop the rage
No one gets to know you. Stopped by their first glance
You and they both walk away, neither gets a second chance
It leaves you torn to pieces, so much you want to share
Surely there is someone who is kind enough to care
Life for you’s been nothing, so much kept within your heart
Your list of imperfections has kept you set apart
Oh to live and love and laugh it surely would be sweet
You have never known it ‘cause you hide out on the street
People walk beside you, they simply do not understand
Why you are so quiet and you refuse to take their hand
They don’t see the imperfections. The only thing that’s wrong
Is that you won’t let them in. You will not share your song
Please do not be a turtle, dare to step outside the shell
Take a walk with others, you will see that all is well
Make a friend of someone. Put your own list aside
Everyone’s got imperfections. You don’t have to hide
You’re just the same as others, and yes you will fit in
People will surround you and they will be your friends
Your spirit will know freedom when you step outside the cage
With the body you’ve been given. There‘ll be no need for rage
A poem By Charles Betts
August 30th 2006
Thank you Charles. I just received this beautiful poem from Charles and I felt the inspiration to share it immediately with all of you. This Friday, February 25th, I will be posting a book review on the novel ”Come To Me” by Christian Author, Laura Davis. I hope you will take a moment to stop by and read it.
WALK WITH THEM ~ February 19, 2011 by Charles Betts
INSPIRATIONAL POEMS
Everyone needs compassion
From someone they can turn to
Who’s kind enough to listen
When life does not go well
A friend along the journey
A shoulder we can lean on
Strong enough to hold us
When we begin to fall
A haven, a safe harbour
A refuge we can sail to
Where we can find protection
When the waves are crashing in
We all need forgiveness
For sins we have committed
Transgressions in our life time
That have harmed another soul
If we can find repentance
A chance to start all over
Do things so much different
Live life another way
Reach out to a neighbour
Be kind to a stranger
Who struggle on their journey
Walk with them a while
A Poem By Charles Betts
Thanks once again Charles for sharing such an inspirational poem with all of us. Charles has been most generous in sharing several poems with us over the last several weeks. I will continue to share his talent on Saturdays when I receive a poem from him.
THOUGHTFUL THURSDAY ~ Dealing With Depression ~ February 17, 2011 by Dolores Ayotte
Depression is a very complex thing and it has the tendency to touch most of our lives in one way or another. I have read that depression is anger turned in. From my own personal frame of reference, I have come to believe that this can be a true statement depending on the an individual’s circumstances. Having said that, I have also come to realize that figuring out what we’re angry about can be a real challenge. “Challenges are what makes life interesting; overcoming them is what makes life meaningful.” (Joshua J. Marine) At times, we become very angry at ourselves and what is going on in our lives. We can also become angry at other people because we may want to blame them for our depressed state or our overall unhappiness. Perhaps the anger is a result of hurt feelings and what other people have said or done to us or what they aren’t doing for us. There is a natural tendency to let this anger fester inside so that it becomes so much bigger than it actually is. Our down feelings or depression actually end up feeding, these oftentimes, perceived hurts and resentments.
When we aren’t enjoying our lives the way we think we should, we may become frustrated and resentful. We can often think it is someone or something outside of ourselves that is causing us to feel this negative way. Even if the harm that has been done to us is very real, it is very difficult to let go of because it has become such a part of our basic being. In essence, this state of depression or negative life cycle can become like a trusty friend that we rely on as we visit these not so positive feelings over and over again.
It’s as if these “down” feelings become comfortable and at times, we can end up isolating ourselves from other people because they may not feel the same about our situation as we do. We think that we understand ourselves so much better because we know what has been done to us and what we feel inside. These inner feelings are okay for a time as we work through the healing process and try to better help ourselves but if we stay there too long, they can become our true enemy. There is a fine line. Making the effort to get past the anger in this negative life cycle is a huge decision. It means that we have decided to let go and to move on in a positive direction. It means that we have decided to forgive not only those who have added to our grief, but to also forgive ourselves. It means that we have now taken back the responsibility for the happiness in our own lives. This decision is not for the faint of heart. “You must do the thing you think you cannot do.” (Eleanor Roosevelt) We must look in the mirror and decide to act.
This is a very crucial point in the healing process. It is the very first step in deciding that we truly want a happier self. It’s taking back our own personal power. “Quality is never an accident. It represents the wise choice of many alternatives.” (Willa Foster) It’s realizing that we are accepting the responsibility for the majority of happiness or unhappiness in our own lives by adjusting our own attitude and choices in life. “The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time.” (Abraham Lincoln) There will be steps forward and steps back but in the end if we make up our minds to endure, we will climb this uphill battle and succeed.
I want to stress once more that this is a very crucial decision. It is much more natural to feel like the victim of someone else’s bad behavior toward us than it is to “grow up” and admit that our own slate may not be as sparkly clean as we perceive it to be. It means we must embrace the fact that we may very well have had a hand in what is happening in our lives. It might explain why we lack confidence, self-esteem and may be adding to our own depressed state. Yuck…who really wants to look at themselves in such an analytical way? If we really want to move up the ladder and onto happier times, we must make a very big decision and take a very big step. This step is what I refer to as the “leap of faith” step because we are also deciding to reach out to a Higher Power and get past these not so good feelings about ourselves. We are not alone. Reach down really deep, and there’s a hand inside you that will reach back and together you will find the strength, the courage, and the inspiration to move on up so you can better see the light of day! “The spirit, and the will to win, and the will to excel are the things that endure.” (Vince Lombardi) Winning the battle over depression, will be one of the biggest victories you will ever make in this game called “life”. I know, I’ve been there.
BLOG HOPPING DAY ~ Mistaken Emotions In Dysfunctional Relationships ~ February 16, 2011 by Darlene Ouimet
Once again,
one of Darlene Ouimet’s post has hit home with me. Darlene has a way of cutting to the quick and explaining things in a very clear and matter of fact way. In this article, she clarifies the difference between excitement and anxiety. I must admit that at times, I have confused the two. On looking back, I realize that I often thought I was excited about an upcoming visit or celebration when in reality I was experiencing stress or anxiety. It’s a fine line and takes a little reflecting to actually know which emotion we are dealing with. Please take a moment to check out Darlene’s article as she explains Mistaken Emotions In Dysfunctional Relationships. Please take a moment to check out some of the comments too.
STONE SOUP ~ February 14, 2011 by Dolores Ayotte
INSPIRATIONAL QUOTES AND ANECDOTES
Right about now I want to go back to my storytelling ways. One of the stories I want to share with you comes from a second grade reader that was used when I taught school many years ago. It’s called Stone Soup. The reason this story has come to mind so many times over the years is because of a somewhat embarrassing situation that took place. After I left teaching and when I was employed by a major bank, I was asked to give my opinion on a certain topic being discussed at a meeting. I was actually stunned to be called upon to put in my two cents worth and I was almost dumbstruck. Finding myself in this awkward situation was totally new to me and my resources were very limited as far as the business world was concerned.
The first thing that popped into my head came from a second grade reader. The fact that we were discussing the roles of individuals within the financial institution seemed to give new relevance to this particular story. This was a story or fairytale that took place during extremely difficult times. Perhaps some of you remember it. For those of you that don’t, please let me tell you a bit about it. According to this “once upon a time” story which took place many years ago, there was much poverty and very little to eat. In essence, the people were all nearly starving to death. There were many small towns scattered about and the towns people were at their wit’s end in trying to just survive.
One day a stranger came to town and right in the middle of the town square, he proceeded to light a fire. Out of curiosity, several of the local folks gathered around and asked him what he was doing. He decided to tell them that he was making “stone soup” when in reality he was actually starving just like them. Most of them jeered and laughed at him because they all knew that there was no such thing as “stone soup” but the stranger insisted that there was indeed a fine recipe. After he lit the fire, he continued to stoke it. When it was big and hot enough, he got a large metal container and filled it with water. He put it over the fire and added a few stones to it and watched the water start to boil. More and more people gathered to watch this man and observe his foolishness. After the water was boiling at full force he asked the large group that had now gathered if any one of them happened to have a tasty onion to add to this “stone soup” recipe of his. Sure enough one person happened to have his request. He them asked if anyone else happened to have a bone or two that could enhance his recipe. Sure enough, some one did. Before you know it, they were others who were standing around that had a few other ingredients to add to this stranger’s recipe for “stone soup”. After adding all that the town folks had to offer, he ended up with quite a tasty pot of soup. He then ladled it out for all to enjoy. In this story, the stranger had nothing to offer except a good idea when he walked into that poverty-stricken town. Not one of them could make a meal with what each had, but by combining what they had together they could make a delicious soup that could be shared by all.
Therefore, I sat around that corporate table for the very first time in my life and related this story. I explained to those in attendance that we all have something to offer in this huge institution but we all need to work together to make it happen. The employees at the bottom of any pyramidal structure have something vital to offer to enhance the success of any business just like the employees in the middle or at the top. I felt that in order to promote the new philosophy that we were discussing at this particular meeting, we would be wise to remember the moral of this particular story. It’s about recognizing and acknowledging what each of us has to offer and working together for the greater good. My supervisor, the one who asked me what I thought in the first place, was impressed enough with this story that at a future meeting in another boardroom she put me on the spot once again. She asked me to repeat it to this level of management and I did. We tried to make a small difference in the way that people think. I have a sneaking suspicion that we touched a few lives in our own way. I sure hope we did!
HAPPY VALENTINE’S EVERYONE!
BRUISED CHILDREN ~ February 12, 2011 by Charles Betts
INSPIRATIONAL POEMS
A sweet young girl with tender eyes
Banished to her room, alone, she cries
Somewhere inside her spirit dies
I think this is a shame
She listens as her mom and dad
Yell at her and say she’s bad
It’s all her fault when they get mad
She thinks she is to blame
A quiet boy with dark sullen stare
Listens as they curse and swear
Just wishing he could hide somewhere
Why do they call him names?
He once was happy. Would sing a song
He had good friends who tagged along
What has happened? What went wrong?
Why is his family strained?
A tender girl, a precious boy
Should only know of love and joy
Play and laugh and share their toys
They should not know this pain
Harsh, angry words. Mean, cruel tones
Hurt much more than sticks and stones
Breaking more than children’s bones
I think adults should refrain
When as parents, we lose control
And we destroy those tiny souls
How will they ever be made whole?
How will they laugh again?
A poem by Charles Betts April 27th, 2005
Thank you once again Charles for sharing such an inspirational poem with us. Charles is a captain on the city of Fredericton, New Brunswick Fire Department where he has worked for the last twenty-five years. I’m pleased to announce that he has sent me two more poems which I will post on the following two Saturdays.
